Posted by: Fawn | January 16, 2009

Therapy Thursday!

Well, I wasn’t planning on letting a few days pass between posts and every night I sat down to post I tried working on the appearance of the blog. I tried, tried. As you can see I wasn’t very successful. I don’t know how this WordPress works yet. So far, I am not impressed. It is very limited. I know just the options we have probably take a lot of work but I am from the days of Live Journal and I could CUSTOMIZE my journal in a hot second with some html. This is nothing like that. I really want to be able to add a photo of myself on the main page without changing my header.

I hope my header picture is not discouraging to anyone. It is meant to say this is what I am not. I am not a baby bird. I want to be stronger than a baby bird, already able to fly.
There is a story behind my name. I think it will be perfect for a post in the future. It comes from a dream I had about a bird and that dream made me decide to change my life for the better.

I hope everyone will be enjoying their 3 day weekend if you have one. Happy early Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Thankyou MLK Jr. for having a dream. Afterall, even now I know that without dreams nothing can change. Here I am making changes based on dreams.

So in the future I will post my baby bird dream but for now there are more pressing things. I should be packing but as a gift to myself I am blogging. I am doing this right now for me while wearing flannel owl pajamas and drinking hot chocolate.

I went to therapy today. I don’t know completely engaged I was though. I feel like it is hard to be engaged in a session when I know I won’t see Doctor for a little while. I feel like why get something started right now that I can’t finish. Even if I don’t know how I will react or feel in therapy, feel like talking or not, being serious or not, I always always go. I made that commitment to get better and so far I have only tried canceling once to get out of it because I was feeling so bad I was feeling far worse then even wanting help. But then I called back and got a later appointment that day. That was when I just started out though.

Today we talked about why should I have friends if I can’t be honest with them. To be honest I think I would be a pretty big downer if I said everything I thought out loud But again that is something I want to work on because If I weren’t thinking negative thoughts I wouldn’t have to express them. So I would be thinking positively and having something great to say that is something I actually feel.

Today I was feeling overwhelmed though. With the Galapagos trip coming ( I leave Saturday morning) This trip was a birthday gift from my boyfriend. I have always wanted to go there and to my surprise he accepted it as the destination when I suggested it. Not that I said, “Give me a Destination Birthday Gift!” I didn’t. He offered to take me on a trip for my birthday which was back in November and then he suggested the Bahamas or Puerto Rico but I thought GALAPAGOS! He has a very bad reptile phobia but he accepted this destination so hopefully he will be OK. I also do not like reptiles but more specifically snakes.
Anyway though,
I ran around today getting errands done. I have almost all of my stuff at his house ready to be packed. I just have to pack my on flight bag, print travel documents and I also had a few things to wash so they are in the dryer.

I have some goals for the trip.
I will be on a cruise ship for a few days and I know they are notorious with providing around the clock food but I really am going to try to choose foods that are good for me and pay attention to when I am hungry. I am bringing my favorite Larabars for when we are out hiking and for the plane ride. Salty peanuts are the last thing I want.

My feet have really been feeling horrible lately but I will be doing a lot of walking on this trip like all trips we go on and also hiking. I hope my feet can hold up. I would like to keep track of miles walked and keep up with it once I get back to Philly. Even though my feet are in pain right now I know walking will help in the long run. Eventually I will have my orthotics and will feel better but I have to work on another foot condition before I get them.

I got a new bag for the trip because my messenger bag I usually use kills my shoulder because it has a thin strap with no cushion and I tend to have a very heavily packed bag. so this is my new one.

I got it at Ross for 20 bucks, I Generally would not go for something so pink but it was all they had and the shape, strap and compartments are all very ideal for the trip. Especially since I will be caring a very heavy camera bag on my back throughout the trip.

Long term goals for health. fix feet, fix back. I am 24… there is a song that says …”When you’re only 23 It’s not attractive to complain about your sore back” I’m 24, quick! Gotta act fast!~

Hopefully I will have lots of wonderful things to share when I get back next week! Enjoy!

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